Shego - The Untold Story
by mileslacey
Summary: My take on why Shego left Team Go.


SHEGO – THE UNTOLD STORY

(or: SHEGO'S LAST DAY WITH TEAM GO)

By mileslacey

(Juche)

The super heroine in the black and green harlequin-patterned body suit strode through the double glass doors of the Go City Police Department. Her long, waist length black hair and pale green skin, not to mention her very shapely body, caught the attention of the various male police officers as she strode past them. While they wolf whistled most of the female police officers made a point of turning their backs on her in what many uninformed people might've regarded as a snubbing driven by envy.

As she made her way through the building a narrator's voice spoke inside her head, saying, '_Super hero Shego of Team Go, born Sharon Kazue Go in Okinawa in 1980, graduated from Go City University in 2001 with a child behaviour degree with a minor in teaching. She became a super hero as part of Team Go at the age of thirteen after the family tree house was struck by a multi-coloured meteor which gave her four brothers and herself super powers. _

_'Shego displays great resistance to pain and the ability to use green plasma energy that she can use to cut, demolish or stun anyone or anything if so inclined. Shego's super powers have mostly been deployed in urban pacification and paparazzi control, mostly after one of their missions have levelled a city block or a paparazzi wants to get a money shot._

_'Academically, Shego graduated second in her senior class at Go City North High School, beaten only by the Head Cheerleader Pran Sing 'T'wot on the technicality that she missed her final class of the year due to a mission. At Go City University she received straight As despite her utter contempt for anything to do with children which grew the more she had to work with them as part of obtaining her degree._

_'She was awarded with several medals of honour for her heroic actions and has served with great honour with Team Go, fighting bad guys and evil villains in Go City while still looking sexy in a black and green harlequin-patterned figure-hugging body suit that won her the Sexiest Super Hero Award in 1995, 1998 and 1999 and runner-up in the award in 1997 and 2000. Shego has also appeared on the front cover of _Super Hero Weekly _and _Body Suit Illustarated _in seven editions._

_'Since becoming a super hero Shego quickly established a reputation for wanton violence and total indifference towards her own safety, that of her siblings and anyone else stupid enough to get within ten feet of her, especially at _that _time of month. To enhance her ability to inflict more pain and suffering on bad guys and her brothers Shego undertook kung fu, ninjitsu and driving education classes and courses in advanced interrogation techniques. Her extra vocational activities are highly classified but there are rumours she works for Mossad, the Russians and may possibly be working for the Freemasons and Illuminati if the conspiracy theorists are to be believed. Until Senor Senior Jnr was allowed to sing to prisoners in prison she held the Guiness Book of World Records of torturing the most people in one session and her interrogation techniques are now used by brutal regimes such as North Korea, Saudi Arabia and Arizona._

_'As part of her Team Go duties Shego has been in many life-threatening situations, having gone up against villains as psychotic as Avarius, Electonique, the Mathter and the Go City North Parent Teacher Association. (The PTA being the reason why Shego won't bake or jump out of cakes any more.) She received a bravery award from President Clinton for explaining to his wife Hillary that he really did not have sex with _that _woman. _

_'In the last twelve months Shego has received so many death threats and special commendations that not even that monument to super-inflated egos out in Go City Harbour, Go Tower, has the wall space to hold them all. Achieving the highest arrest record of any super hero in North America she has only been injured three times: in 1994 when her vibrator short circuited and electrocuted her, in 1997 when Hego's appalling karaoke singing made her claw her face with her gloves with the sharpened nails on them and in July 2001 when she was stabbed by a high school cheerleader dressed as Tinkerbell who took exception to Shego hitting on her boyfriend.'_

The moment she stepped into the office of the Police Commissioner Pigu Jiewen the narrator voice inside her head went silent. 'Thank God,' she grumbled. She walked over to the desk and shook the man's hand. It was clammy and made her feel uncomfortable.

'Please take a seat, Miss Shego.'

'Thanks, Jiewen,' she said as she took a seat in front of his desk.

'You'll be pleased to know that the cheerleader you used for plasma target practice last month has been taken off life support,' Jiewen stated.

'She actually survived?' Shego stammered incredulously.

'No,' the Police Commissioner said as he stuffed the special Hot Babes of Villainy edition of _Villain's Digest _into his top drawer.

'No loss then?'

'I wouldn't say that. Her family's suing Team Go.'

'Did you bring me down here to talk about dead cheerleaders or did you bring me down here for something more important?'

Jiewen began a rambling speech that sounded worse than the ones she had to sit through at high school. 'Things are changing these days, Shego. People expect more from their super heroes. They expect their super heroes to have the right moral standards so they can be good role models for children and avoid the necessity of some stupid trailer-park cow from having to answer awkward questions from her brats like why Shego can tell a city councillor to go [CENSORED] himself but they can't or what you were doing with your hand up some hot tennis player's skirt last Saturday night.'

Shego rolled her eyes contemptuously. 'What I get up to when I am fighting the bad guys or in my private life is my own business.'

Patronisingly, Jiewen remarked, 'My dear Shego, you just don't understand the politics of crime fighting. People expect us cops to be trigger-happy donut-eating neanderthals who shoot their guns at the slightest excuse whenever they see some nigger – excuse my language, Afro-American – in their neighbourhood and elect me accordingly. But if I can't control the super heroes it really messes up my re-election chances and that is bad for everyone.'

'Listen, Jiewen, people come to us to get things done and we get things done,' Shego bragged. 'Well, me, mostly but you get the picture.'

'Indeed you do,' Jiewen stated matter-of-factly as he pulled out a folder from his second to top desk drawer and slammed it on his desk. 'In fact, you've had more people thrown in jail than the entire law enforcement community this side of the Mississippi. In fact, we think it is time that your skills were put to better use. The FBI are offering you a position as a law enforcement consultant, which we all agree would be an excellent opportunity for you.'

'Go on,' Shego asked suspiciously.

'In Guam,' Jiewen announced.

'I'm sorry, where?'

'Guam. It's an island - .'

'I know where Guam is! My grandfather fought in the Battle for Guam in 1944. It's in the middle of nowhere!'

'Well, I wouldn't say that exactly but it's a really lovely place, though. My wife and I went there on our wedding anniversary last year.'

Shego got up from her chair. 'Isn't there some sort of FBI consultancy job a little closer to civilisation?'

'No.'

'Seriously?' Shego stammered. 'In a country of three hundred million people you're telling me there's no FBI consultancy jobs within any of the fifty states?'

'No.'

'I want to be here in Go City with my friends and my family.' She paused momentarily to think about that. 'Well, not my brothers.'

'Regretfully, that's not an option.'

'Do I have any say in this matter?'

'No.'

'I like Go City,' Shego protested. 'It's LGBT friendly. It's got great clothes shops. Everyone respects me.'

Jiewen sniggered when he heard the last comment. 'Well, you've always wanted to live in the tropics, lazing away on a beautiful island, surrounded by hot guys serving you drinks.'

'Yeah, when I'm, like, in my late thirties when I'm getting a little old for this super hero crap.'

'But this is a great opportunity for you. You'll be getting a pay packet and you'll have steady work.'

'Hang on a minute, Jiewen!' Shego was now pounding on the man's desk angrily with her fist. 'This sounds like an attempt to break up Team Go!'

'That's just paranoia, Shego. There's nothing to stop you from coming back to assist Team Go from time to time on really difficult missions. Besides, I'm sure you'd love to get away from your bossy older brother.'

Shego thought to herself that this guy was really good, pushing just the right buttons.

'I want to talk to the Mayor,' Shego demanded icily.

'Sure, but the Mayor is only going to say exactly what I've told you.'

Jiewen reached over to the phone and speed dialled the Mayor. The Mayor walked into the office and took a seat behind the desk next to the Police Commissioner.

'Hello, Shego. I'm sure you heard about the untimely demise of the cheerleader you blasted out of a six storey building?'

'Yeah, can't we get over that?'

'And how are things at home, dearie?'

'What did you call me?'

'Calm down, Shego. I didn't mean anything by that. I'm just interested in how things are at home with your brothers now that your parents have moved to New York City to work for that brokerage firm.'

'My parents were killed in the 9/11 attacks. What do you think?'

'Oh, sorry to hear about that. So you're still in Go Tower, then?'

'Yes.'

'You must be finding it hard to put up with your brothers after such a tragedy and I'm sure that a girl like you really wants to just get out there and make it on your own, rather than putting up with those well-meaning but rather, how do I put this diplomatically, inept brothers?'

The Police Commissioner added, 'I'm sure that some time in the tropics will help you with your grieving while your brothers sort themselves out without having to worry about their little sister. Look, Shego, the FBI are offering you a luxury villa on a beautiful beach near Guam's biggest community, a six figure salary and a laid back lifestyle with a steady job. It'll be really good for you.'

'This is bullshit.'

'It's called politics, Miss,' the Mayor corrected her.

'Sorry, guys, but I'm not leaving.'

'You want to take this higher, no doubt?'

'Damn bloody right I do!' Shego demanded.

'You want me to bring in the Governor?'

'Yes.'

'Seriously?'

'Note serious face!'

'Okay.'

Jiewen called out, 'Governor!'

A tall, black man with big ears dressed in a grey suit walked into the office. He walked over to Shego and shook her hand. 'Nice to finally meet the great Shego. I've heard much about you.' He sat down on the other side of the Police Commissioner.

'I take it you heard about -.'

'Yes!' Shego snapped.

'Governor -.'

'Listen to me, Shego. I know what you're going to say about this job opportunity but the fact is you're making us look bad. You have put so many people in hospital and jail that we have run out of hospital beds and jail cells to put them into. Of course, we appreciate what you have done for Go City but the truth is you're letting the side down.'

Shego's jaw dropped from the shock of what the man was saying.

The Governor continued, 'You see, law and order is all about being a team player. You know: I scratch your back, you scratch mine and all those other tedious cliches. You can't keep being the Wonder Woman of Go City. If we keep letting you run around Go City the way you have you'll put us all out of a job.'

'You're kidding me, right?' Shego exclaimed. 'You can't just make me disappear.'

'Actually I can. I am the Governor of Michigan.'

'You can threaten me all you like but there's one thing you haven't taken into account and that's what Team Go and your colleagues in the police department are going to make of this.'

Angrily, Shego stormed out of the Police Commissioner's office and found herself confronted by a huge banner erected across the station announcing "GOOD LUCK SHEGO! 頑張って彼女は、行く!" Nearly every uniformed police officer in the building seemed to be there, with a wine glass in hand, toasting her departure. Unable to comprehend what was happening, she stormed out of the building in a fury.

When she walked into Go Tower she walked in on Hego and Mego arguing over something stupid. She threw her hands in the air and cried, 'I give up!'

She went to her bedroom and grabbed her clothes from her drawers and wardrobe and stuffed them into a bag. As she walked back through the main room where Hego and Mego were arguing she said, 'I quit.'

Hego exclaimed, 'You what?'

'I quit. I've been offered a job somewhere else and I'm taking it.'

'You can't leave,' Hego protested. 'We're a team. We need you.'

'Ah, let her go. Anything has to be better than listening to you prattling on like one of those lame super hero movies,' Mego remarked derisively.

'But we need her, even if she is a smart-mouth prone to excessive violence.'

And so Hego and Mego resumed fighting. Frustrated, Shego walked out. Secretly, she would've been quite willing to unpack her things if her brothers had stopped arguing long enough to convince her to come back. But even after she was back on the mainland she was disappointed to see her brothers had made no attempt to stop her.

But she never got to the FBI office. As she walked past a news stand she saw an edition of _Villain's Digest _and flicked through it. In the "Situations Vacant" section she read a small advert. "Ambitious Mad Scientist seeking intelligent and physically fit sidekick to assist with world domination plans. Contact Drakken 1-248-666-0000."

She called this Drakken guy on the phone.

A grumpy voice snarled on the other side snarled, 'Hello, Dr Drakken here. What do you want?'

The rest, so they say, is history.

THE END


End file.
